Fear: part 1

When I was a little boy, I used to be scared of so many things, but I was mostly afraid of the dark. I was so afraid of the dark because whenever it was dark, I would imagine so many things in my mind. I would make what was in my mind become reality. Often, my older brother warned me about watch scary or adventurous movies, generally because I was too young to watch them. But I never listened to him, I watched them anyway.

Need I say, whatever I watched remained in my young mind and it affected me always whenever the nights came. Whatever I watched came to real life in my room when the lights were turned off and I often covered my whole self with my blanket, trembling with fear because “the monster” was out there.

I was always happy whenever I woke up the next day. Perhaps “the monster” hadn’t seen me, but whatever the case, I was just glad to be alive. The dark continued to scare me but it reached a point where I wondered “how comes am always alive in the morning?” “is there really a monster out there or is it just me? My parents seem to be okay, so it really must be me…”

That line of thought made me wonder if I had made things up, which I did through my imaginations. With that in mind, I decided that I would face the dark whatever may come I am ready.

I have from that point managed to stay calm whenever it’s dark and I’ve actually found out that the darkness is not really as bad as I thought.

2020 incoming…

Most people have called it “the end of a decade” but really, 2019 is ending. What a year 2019 has been. In my negative realm, I have a lot to complain about. In my positive self, am thankful for a lot things. But one thing comes to my mind as 2019 draws to a close, “have I accomplished the goals I set out for 2019?”

My answer….not even close!

Oh well, here hopefully comes another year, 2020. (I say “hopefully” because you never know what happens between now and tomorrow.) I heard someone say “2020 is going to be your year” what happens then if it isn’t? Am I right then to call that person a liar?

I always wonder if sometimes we as people entering a new year, that all will change. That new things will happen in the New Year and all will be well, our problems will remain in the past year and this New Year will set the tone for new beginnings. I wonder if we are just putting our faith in the New Year to change things. Have we lost faith in ourselves to change things that we just leave it all to the New Year to be different than the past years?

Am happy for 2020 to come, heck, I can’t wait! But, I can’t base my hope that the New Year will automatically change things for me. All I can say is that we are the ones that hold the cards in our hands to be the difference in 2020. The ball is in our hands to make 2020 a better year or not, it all depends on you…not on the New Year.

But what I say is…HAPPY NEW YEAR 2020.

It begins

We each have a story to tell. I believe this is true for each individual. We have all experienced something while alive on this Earth, but each person has gone through a lot to be where they are.

Some have experienced great troubles, while others, it’s been smooth sailing. Regardless, we all have something to share whether it be a lesson or a period of change.

Am just here to share my story in a different way.